STRUGGLING!
I am struggling with this thing called weight! I know what I need to do to get rid of the excess but I don't want to! I just want the end results....do I sound like, Phoebe, my 2 year old or what? I need to get myself together before starting anything though because I am truly tired of this whole merry go round that I have been on. I WANT OFF!
My friend posted today that she is feeling like a marshmellow stuffed in a pen cap today, I can totally relate as this is how I have been feeling lately. I had sucessfully lost about 30 lbs but quickly regained them and am back to weighing more that I did after both of my kids. I am turing 40 this October and had planned on being thin by then...oops. I guess my plans need more than dreams to kick them off.
I did make an appointment with my MD to be sure that my lab work is okay before undergoing anything, I want to do this the correct way and be sure that it will last. Now I know that it won't just disappear, but I would like to deposit it into the bank of fat forever. Small deposits weakly would be just fine. Inside my head is screaming, "I don't want to give anything up". Anything being food....what is my problem???
Monday, August 23, 2010
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
needing to make a real change!
I am sitting here in front of my computer knowing that I really need to make a change, but so far have been resistant. This past January, I started to follow an organic, gluten free diet....I felt wonderful! Then I stopped. I am not sure why exactly I stopped, but I did. I really feel like I need to get back to that person I was in January, but am morning the loss of all the baked goods that I love so much.
Just a little history, I have always loved food. I have successfully followed Weight Watchers, only to gain the weight back. I did follow the Overeaters Anonymous diet, essentially no flour no sugar and the weight fell off me....only to fall right back on. This past fall, my eczema was out of control. All the doctors would prescribe for me was topical steroids, which being applied to your face isn't good. I started talking to people who have eczema and no longer have symptoms. They all had one thing in common, they were gluten free. So I started to research gluten...I learned that I have many of the symptoms of gluten intolerance or possibly Celiac Disease. So I decided that I would start my gluten free diet after the new year. I did great, felt wonderful and oh yeah the weight was starting to leave me :)
Then something happened and I started eating gluten again. It wasn't like I was feeling deprived. Actually, I had tried to add it back into my diet and found that I had horrible stomach pains and diarrhea, my eczema would start to weep and bleed. You would think that would be enough for me to learn that I shouldn't have gluten. But noooooo, I am a little slow on the uptake and start eating my old ways in a vengence and now I am sitting here miserable and gearing myself up for the diet change that I truly know works for me.
My current symptoms include, bad eczema in and around my ears, exhaustion beyond what it should be considering the amount of sleep I get, irritability/overall moodiness and constipation, oh yeah and my roseacia has come back, and I have started to gain weight again.
What is it going to take to get me back onto the healthy lifestyle that I want to live and feel better? I am going to be 40 this October and would like to be feeling better and back to running. I am working on my foot pain so that I can start walking and ultimately running again. But the diet is an area that I am fighting....why???
Just a little history, I have always loved food. I have successfully followed Weight Watchers, only to gain the weight back. I did follow the Overeaters Anonymous diet, essentially no flour no sugar and the weight fell off me....only to fall right back on. This past fall, my eczema was out of control. All the doctors would prescribe for me was topical steroids, which being applied to your face isn't good. I started talking to people who have eczema and no longer have symptoms. They all had one thing in common, they were gluten free. So I started to research gluten...I learned that I have many of the symptoms of gluten intolerance or possibly Celiac Disease. So I decided that I would start my gluten free diet after the new year. I did great, felt wonderful and oh yeah the weight was starting to leave me :)
Then something happened and I started eating gluten again. It wasn't like I was feeling deprived. Actually, I had tried to add it back into my diet and found that I had horrible stomach pains and diarrhea, my eczema would start to weep and bleed. You would think that would be enough for me to learn that I shouldn't have gluten. But noooooo, I am a little slow on the uptake and start eating my old ways in a vengence and now I am sitting here miserable and gearing myself up for the diet change that I truly know works for me.
My current symptoms include, bad eczema in and around my ears, exhaustion beyond what it should be considering the amount of sleep I get, irritability/overall moodiness and constipation, oh yeah and my roseacia has come back, and I have started to gain weight again.
What is it going to take to get me back onto the healthy lifestyle that I want to live and feel better? I am going to be 40 this October and would like to be feeling better and back to running. I am working on my foot pain so that I can start walking and ultimately running again. But the diet is an area that I am fighting....why???
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